By ROSS BISHOFF
Think back for a moment, back to that first time when, as a boy, you were kicked in the nether regions that first magical time.
Not a fun flashback is it?
In fact, you may have buried it deep, deep down in your subconscious between your worst drinking binge in college and that time Rosie O’Donnell had her own TV show.
Yeah, that’s healthy.
Sadly, each weekend since this NFL season kicked off I’ve been re-living that memory because the past, what, nine weeks—my God, it’s only been nine weeks?—have been gross.
The teams that hold a special warm place in my heart have stepped all over it in 2017. The 49ers were expected to be bad, but 0-9?
Cue up random sportscaster voice, “but they’ve only lost by a combined,” shut up Trev or Kev or Terry. In the immortal words of Bill Parcells, you are what your record says you are.
And this is a winless team. A franchise that once ruled the world has only had a Jim Harbaugh highlight blip in a decade-ish span of pathetic ineptitude.
And then, there’s the Oakland Raiders, who suddenly got so good last season many were expecting them to make a Super Bowl run. Seriously, they entered the season loaded for a run.
They’re 4-5, and that’s with a win over the mighty Miami Dolphins this past weekend.
Disappointment, thy name is Del Rio.
The fallback plan, in times of crisis, are Ohio teams. Not that I necessarily root for or against them, but the Browns and Bengals are always interesting. And really, as far as train wrecks go, they are.
But I honestly thought this year things could get better. I even wrote about it to start the season.
Now? I mean, the A.J. McCarron trade fiasco alone made the Browns look thoroughly hopeless. That and, oh, the 0-8 record and the sense things are actually getting worse this season under Hue Jackson.
The Bengals are 3-5 but they’re just as disappointing if not more so. This team was supposed to be in the playoffs. Now, they’re a bad team in a bad division and Marvin Lewis may not make it another year. It’s gotten so bad, even A.J. Green is getting in fistfights.
It’s a disaster.
The whole season is an unmitigated disaster.
And it’s why I’m spending my Sundays taking long walks.
Number of the Week: 280
– As of Monday, 419sports.com’s poll had 280 people voting “Yes!” to the question: Should the OHSAA expand the playoffs past eight teams in each region. All 280 people were wrong.
Quote of the Week: “When the time comes to lay down the hammer, she’s a fierce competitor.”
– Minster girls cross country coach Jessie Magoto was talking about sophomore Emma Watcke. Watcke won the Division III girls state cross country championship this past weekend with an 18:38.4 time. Minster’s girls defended their state title with 34 points.